1
00:00:04,422 --> 00:00:06,590
[opening theme song playing]

2
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♪ Chico, don't
be discouraged ♪

3
00:00:25,985 --> 00:00:30,614
♪ The Man he ain't
so hard to understand ♪

4
00:00:31,657 --> 00:00:36,912
♪ Chico, if you try now ♪

5
00:00:36,954 --> 00:00:41,792
♪ I know that you can
lend a helping hand ♪

6
00:00:41,876 --> 00:00:45,004
♪ Because there's good
in everyone ♪

7
00:00:45,087 --> 00:00:47,465
♪ And a new day has begun ♪

8
00:00:47,506 --> 00:00:53,345
♪ You can see the morning sun
if you try ♪

9
00:00:53,429 --> 00:00:58,309
♪ And I know,
things will be better ♪

10
00:00:58,350 --> 00:01:04,106
♪ Oh, yes, they will
for Chico and the Man ♪

11
00:01:04,148 --> 00:01:08,110
♪ Yes they will
for Chico and the Man ♪

12
00:01:26,504 --> 00:01:27,712
[glass clinks]

13
00:01:34,678 --> 00:01:36,138
[rattling]

14
00:02:06,877 --> 00:02:09,046
Boy, that's what I call coffee.

15
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:12,299
Hi, Uncle ED

16
00:02:19,431 --> 00:02:20,891
You know better than that.

17
00:02:20,975 --> 00:02:23,227
You should never wear a
newspaper on your head.

18
00:02:23,269 --> 00:02:25,062
Why?

19
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:27,731
Because some nearsighted canary might
mistake it for the bottom of a bird gate.

20
00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:31,318
Is this why I brought
you back from Mexico?

21
00:02:31,401 --> 00:02:34,238
No. You brought me back
because you love me.

22
00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:37,366
Hey, you.
Is this Ed Brown's garage?

23
00:02:37,407 --> 00:02:39,118
No, it's the Superdome.

24
00:02:40,703 --> 00:02:42,913
- Of course, it's a garage.
- Here.

25
00:02:43,581 --> 00:02:44,582
What's all this?

26
00:02:44,623 --> 00:02:46,208
Well, I'm not sure,

27
00:02:46,250 --> 00:02:48,919
but my guess is that some guy's
really crazy about you.

28
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I'll thank you not to touch me.

29
00:02:53,215 --> 00:02:55,008
I'm not wearing my flea collar.

30
00:02:55,843 --> 00:02:57,261
Very funny. Very funny.

31
00:02:57,303 --> 00:02:59,763
Get out of here and take
your friend with you.

32
00:03:02,391 --> 00:03:04,101
Well, who are they from?

33
00:03:04,143 --> 00:03:09,481
They're from Antonio Javier Rodriguez
Gutierrez Los Perales Santana...

34
00:03:10,774 --> 00:03:12,943
Are you reading his name or the menu?

35
00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:15,696
No, that's a man's name.

36
00:03:15,779 --> 00:03:18,324
Hey, Raulito!

37
00:03:20,159 --> 00:03:21,160
Hi!

38
00:03:21,243 --> 00:03:22,745
Good to see you.

39
00:03:24,705 --> 00:03:27,791
Ah,look who's here.
The bionic mouth.

40
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Well, at least, my battery is not dead.

41
00:03:31,669 --> 00:03:32,838
- Wow!
- Wow?

42
00:03:32,922 --> 00:03:34,590
Look all of these beautiful flowers.

43
00:03:34,632 --> 00:03:36,300
Somebody sent it to you.

44
00:03:36,342 --> 00:03:38,844
Maybe your battery is
not dead after all.

45
00:03:39,970 --> 00:03:41,347
The flowers are for you.

46
00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:43,015
For me, Let's see.

47
00:03:43,098 --> 00:03:48,604
They are from Antonio Javier Rodriguez
Gutierrez de Los Perales...

48
00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:50,564
Gee, I wonder.

49
00:03:50,648 --> 00:03:55,903
It could be the same Antonio Javier
Rodriguez Gutierres de Los Perales...

50
00:03:55,986 --> 00:03:57,321
that I'm engaged to.

51
00:03:57,905 --> 00:03:59,406
Wait a minute.

52
00:03:59,490 --> 00:04:01,659
You never mentioned being engaged.

53
00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:04,286
Did that happen while Uncle
Ed and I were in Mexico?

54
00:04:04,328 --> 00:04:09,291
No, that it was when I and
he was eight year old.

55
00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:10,793
Mmm.

56
00:04:10,834 --> 00:04:13,128
I never forget-- I never forget
the first time he kissed me.

57
00:04:13,170 --> 00:04:15,589
I was excited.
I get red all over.

58
00:04:15,673 --> 00:04:19,468
You got engaged when you
were only eight years old?

59
00:04:19,510 --> 00:04:21,303
Mm-hmm.

60
00:04:21,345 --> 00:04:24,515
Antonio knew me when my gochi-gochi
was only a gichi-gichi.

61
00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:28,017
You know, when we were children,

62
00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:31,230
our family decided that
we will get married.

63
00:04:31,313 --> 00:04:34,733
But not until we were both grown out.

64
00:04:34,817 --> 00:04:36,360
You mean grown up?

65
00:04:36,402 --> 00:04:37,528
No, no.

66
00:04:37,611 --> 00:04:40,572
He was grown up, she grew out.

67
00:04:42,533 --> 00:04:45,035
But you're really not gonna marry
him, are you, Aunt Charo?

68
00:04:45,077 --> 00:04:46,495
Of course, I have to.

69
00:04:46,537 --> 00:04:49,039
I cannot go back on my family promise.

70
00:04:49,081 --> 00:04:50,541
But that's crazy, marrying someone

71
00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:52,626
who can turn out to be a
big pain in the neck.

72
00:04:52,710 --> 00:04:55,838
Oh, no, I don't think so.
He's really not like that.

73
00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:57,880
- I wasn't talking about him.
- Ah.

74
00:04:57,964 --> 00:04:59,341
But this is America.

75
00:04:59,383 --> 00:05:01,885
Your parents can't tell
you who to marry.

76
00:05:01,969 --> 00:05:03,637
He's right.

77
00:05:03,721 --> 00:05:05,597
The Constitution declares that
every citizen has the right

78
00:05:05,681 --> 00:05:08,183
to be nagged by the
mother-in-law of his choice.

79
00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:10,936
Hey, what does this guy do for a living?

80
00:05:11,020 --> 00:05:14,898
- He's a matador. Ole!
- A matador?

81
00:05:14,940 --> 00:05:18,360
You mean he's a real bullfighter?

82
00:05:18,402 --> 00:05:19,570
Is he any good?

83
00:05:19,611 --> 00:05:20,571
I don't think so.

84
00:05:20,612 --> 00:05:22,406
I only saw him fight once.

85
00:05:22,448 --> 00:05:25,034
And the bull hate him,
the crowd hate him

86
00:05:25,075 --> 00:05:26,994
and even his own picador hate him.

87
00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:28,912
How did you know that?

88
00:05:28,996 --> 00:05:32,499
Because it was the first time I
ever saw a picador ignore the bull

89
00:05:32,583 --> 00:05:35,252
and stick the darts in the matador neck.

90
00:05:37,212 --> 00:05:39,255
Well, I think matadors are great.

91
00:05:39,298 --> 00:05:40,883
- Do you have a picture of him?
- Sure.

92
00:05:40,924 --> 00:05:42,676
I carry it with me all the time.

93
00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:43,927
Oh, you're gonna love him.

94
00:05:43,969 --> 00:05:46,305
This is him in the arena.

95
00:05:46,388 --> 00:05:48,432
He's the one without the horn.

96
00:05:49,808 --> 00:05:51,894
- Doesn't he look terrific?
- Yah.

97
00:05:51,935 --> 00:05:54,313
Patent leather shoes,

98
00:05:54,396 --> 00:05:55,606
silk britches,

99
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:59,693
brocade jacket, black hat
and his hair in a pigtail?

100
00:05:59,777 --> 00:06:03,529
Uncle Ed, have you ever seen
anyone dressed like that?

101
00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:05,282
Only on The Gong Show.

102
00:06:06,742 --> 00:06:10,120
Gee, I'd love to be a
bullfighter when I grow up.

103
00:06:10,162 --> 00:06:12,998
You? But listen, there
is nothing to stop you.

104
00:06:13,082 --> 00:06:14,333
As a matter of fact, you could make

105
00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:16,668
a very, very good bullfighter.

106
00:06:16,752 --> 00:06:18,462
I can see you now.

107
00:06:18,545 --> 00:06:21,048
Walking into the Plaza de Toros.

108
00:06:21,130 --> 00:06:23,884
Ole, Ole!

109
00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:26,095
In your shiny suit of lights.

110
00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:29,306
Your jacket alone cost $2,000.

111
00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:31,517
And that doesn't include the batteries.

112
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:34,645
The bull paws, angrily,
the air, like that.

113
00:06:34,686 --> 00:06:37,231
The bull has some chewing
gum stuck to his hoof.

114
00:06:37,314 --> 00:06:39,108
And then... [vocalizes]

115
00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:40,984
- The bull charges.
- How much does he charge?

116
00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:43,654
- Oh, be quite, Ed. Shut up.
- All right.

117
00:06:43,695 --> 00:06:44,904
Cierra la trompa.

118
00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:47,032
Now is coming, the moment of the truth.

119
00:06:47,116 --> 00:06:48,617
Do you know what the
moment of the truth is?

120
00:06:48,659 --> 00:06:51,370
Sure, that's when the matador
looks into the stands

121
00:06:51,452 --> 00:06:53,997
and sees his wife necking
with his best friend.

122
00:06:54,957 --> 00:06:56,250
Listen to me.

123
00:06:56,333 --> 00:06:58,085
Do you have an idea what a matador does?

124
00:06:58,168 --> 00:07:00,003
Yes. I'd love to try that.

125
00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:01,713
Okay, let's see it.
Let's see it.

126
00:07:01,797 --> 00:07:03,005
You're gonna try it.

127
00:07:10,180 --> 00:07:11,682
How did he do that?

128
00:07:27,281 --> 00:07:30,617
Hey, what do you say, fellas?

129
00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:32,286
Hello, Louie. How are you?

130
00:07:32,369 --> 00:07:34,037
- How're you doing there, Raul?
- I'm good.

131
00:07:34,121 --> 00:07:36,290
Hey, Ed, where'd you get the flowers?

132
00:07:36,373 --> 00:07:37,583
Oh, somebody sent them.

133
00:07:37,666 --> 00:07:39,126
How come?

134
00:07:39,209 --> 00:07:41,879
Did you finally fix
somebody's car right?

135
00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:45,257
- Eh.
- No... They're for Aunt Charo.

136
00:07:45,340 --> 00:07:48,969
You mean she fixed somebody's car right?

137
00:07:49,052 --> 00:07:50,345
No, no, no.

138
00:07:50,387 --> 00:07:52,264
They're from the guy who's
gonna marry Charo.

139
00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:54,516
- Charo's getting married?
- Yeah.

140
00:07:54,558 --> 00:07:55,434
To who?

141
00:07:55,517 --> 00:07:57,144
To a guy who fell in love with her

142
00:07:57,227 --> 00:08:00,189
when she was only eight years old.

143
00:08:00,230 --> 00:08:02,566
Eight years old.

144
00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:04,067
Well, I suppose...

145
00:08:04,109 --> 00:08:07,154
anybody who likes children
can't be all bad.

146
00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:09,740
- Hey! Hello, everybody!
- What?

147
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:11,575
Wait until you hear my news.

148
00:08:11,617 --> 00:08:14,036
My fiance is coming here to meet me.

149
00:08:14,077 --> 00:08:15,412
He should be here any minute.

150
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:17,539
- He's coming here to the garage?
- Yes.

151
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:19,917
Why didn't you arrange to
meet him in your hotel room?

152
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,001
No way.

153
00:08:21,084 --> 00:08:22,669
He's a Spanish gentleman.

154
00:08:22,753 --> 00:08:25,422
And if we are alone
together in a hotel room,

155
00:08:25,464 --> 00:08:27,382
he will lost respect for me.

156
00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:29,885
- He will lose respect for you?
- Yes.

157
00:08:29,927 --> 00:08:32,596
Just think, at this moment,

158
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:34,890
in thousands of hotel rooms
all over the country,

159
00:08:34,932 --> 00:08:38,101
people are having a great time
losing respect for each other.

160
00:08:40,062 --> 00:08:43,649
America, America, America.
All you think about is sex.

161
00:08:43,732 --> 00:08:45,817
Well, don't you think
about sex in Spain.

162
00:08:45,901 --> 00:08:49,363
No. We learn about sex in
Spain by watching the bull,

163
00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:51,448
how they make little bullets.

164
00:08:53,784 --> 00:08:58,163
You must remember, this man
has honorable intentions.

165
00:08:58,247 --> 00:09:00,290
We are going to get married.

166
00:09:00,374 --> 00:09:04,211
Really? He's coming all the way
from Spain just for your nuptials?

167
00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:05,963
Certainly not.

168
00:09:06,004 --> 00:09:08,756
He wants me for my mind, too.

169
00:09:10,133 --> 00:09:11,468
Aunt Charo...

170
00:09:12,844 --> 00:09:15,722
How do you know you will still like him?

171
00:09:15,806 --> 00:09:17,057
I'm not as sure.

172
00:09:17,140 --> 00:09:19,226
So when Antonio gets here,

173
00:09:19,309 --> 00:09:22,980
you please don't leave us never
alone, the two of us together.

174
00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:24,398
Do you want to be my dueña?

175
00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:27,567
Oh, sure, I'll do
anything-- What's a dueña?

176
00:09:27,651 --> 00:09:30,237
Dueña is Spanish for chaperone.

177
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:32,322
He's somebody who is
there to keep people

178
00:09:32,364 --> 00:09:36,326
from going to dark places and
doing something naughty.

179
00:09:36,368 --> 00:09:38,537
Something naughty, huh?

180
00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:40,622
That's not a dewania.
That's an usher.

181
00:09:40,664 --> 00:09:41,540
Oh...

182
00:09:42,624 --> 00:09:43,875
[horn honking]

183
00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:45,419
A car stopped outside.

184
00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:47,504
- Maybe it's him.
- Maybe it's him.

185
00:09:49,381 --> 00:09:51,300
I think I'm gonna bust.

186
00:09:51,341 --> 00:09:52,718
I think I'm gonna watch.

187
00:09:53,927 --> 00:09:55,095
It's him! It's him!

188
00:09:55,178 --> 00:09:56,679
- It's him!
- Oh, it's him!

189
00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:02,227
Antonio!

190
00:10:02,311 --> 00:10:05,564
Ch-- Ch-- Charo!

191
00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:09,818
Antonio.

192
00:10:09,860 --> 00:10:12,321
My goodness.
I almost didn't recognize you

193
00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:15,032
without the darts stuck in your neck.

194
00:10:15,073 --> 00:10:16,491
- Antonio.
- Yes.

195
00:10:16,533 --> 00:10:17,951
- I want you meet my American friends.
- Yes.

196
00:10:18,035 --> 00:10:19,785
Senor Eduardo Brown.

197
00:10:19,870 --> 00:10:21,830
My nephew, Raulito.
Senor Louie.

198
00:10:21,872 --> 00:10:23,206
Ah.

199
00:10:27,586 --> 00:10:29,588
That's the trouble with
being the garbage man.

200
00:10:29,671 --> 00:10:31,673
Nobody ever wants to kiss your hand.

201
00:10:34,885 --> 00:10:39,389
Charo, I have brought for you a gift.

202
00:10:40,557 --> 00:10:41,224
Oh...

203
00:10:41,308 --> 00:10:42,893
This is beautiful.

204
00:10:42,976 --> 00:10:46,313
- Are they real ones, or are they falsies?
- Oh.

205
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:50,107
Wow!

206
00:10:50,192 --> 00:10:52,569
A real bullfighter.

207
00:10:52,652 --> 00:10:55,947
Senor Antonio, would you teach
me about bullfighting?

208
00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:58,742
Well, I am a trifle fatigued.

209
00:10:58,784 --> 00:11:02,078
But for your nephew... anything.

210
00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:03,246
Come with me, little boy.

211
00:11:03,288 --> 00:11:04,373
Make way, gentlemen.

212
00:11:04,414 --> 00:11:06,249
This is no place for mere mortals.

213
00:11:06,333 --> 00:11:09,753
All right, now, you are the fierce bull.

214
00:11:09,795 --> 00:11:12,422
I'm the matador.

215
00:11:12,464 --> 00:11:15,675
Yes, this will do very
well for the cape.

216
00:11:26,102 --> 00:11:27,479
How did he do that?

217
00:11:29,147 --> 00:11:30,357
Follow me.

218
00:11:33,068 --> 00:11:35,612
- Are you ready, Raulito?
- Yes.

219
00:11:36,488 --> 00:11:38,865
Ha-ha! Toro!

220
00:11:38,949 --> 00:11:39,908
Ole!

221
00:11:39,950 --> 00:11:41,660
You see how cleverly I--

222
00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:42,869
[screaming]

223
00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:45,455
Get back!

224
00:11:46,498 --> 00:11:47,749
Get up! Get up!

225
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:51,711
[groaning]

226
00:11:58,260 --> 00:12:01,596
[moaning]

227
00:12:13,150 --> 00:12:14,860
[continues moaning]

228
00:12:20,073 --> 00:12:21,783
Okay, pal. What do you want?

229
00:12:22,409 --> 00:12:23,577
Fill her up.

230
00:12:23,660 --> 00:12:25,828
Senor Brown. Senor Brown.

231
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,083
Wat-- Por favor, Water.

232
00:12:30,167 --> 00:12:32,919
Sorry, pal.
This customer is ahead of you.

233
00:12:33,003 --> 00:12:33,837
[groans]

234
00:12:35,005 --> 00:12:36,047
Here, hold this.

235
00:12:44,181 --> 00:12:45,724
What's the matter with him?

236
00:12:45,807 --> 00:12:47,726
I think he wants a glass of water.

237
00:12:47,809 --> 00:12:49,519
[Antonio moaning]

238
00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:51,396
Why is he moaning like that?

239
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:52,898
He's got a horn stuck in him.

240
00:12:55,859 --> 00:12:56,860
[whistles]

241
00:12:56,902 --> 00:12:58,612
That must have been some accident.

242
00:13:01,865 --> 00:13:03,909
Where did it happen?
On the freeway?

243
00:13:05,285 --> 00:13:07,703
No, He was gored by a bull.

244
00:13:09,039 --> 00:13:11,500
How much of this stuff have you had?

245
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:14,211
Well, let me see.

246
00:13:14,252 --> 00:13:16,880
I started drinking in 1934.

247
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:21,301
Hey, you got a problem here.

248
00:13:21,384 --> 00:13:22,719
The screw on this clamp is loose,

249
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,386
but I'll fix it right away.

250
00:13:24,471 --> 00:13:26,056
[continues moaning]

251
00:13:27,849 --> 00:13:28,558
[screams in pain]

252
00:13:28,642 --> 00:13:29,726
[moaning continues]

253
00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:32,979
Isn't there anything I can do?

254
00:13:33,063 --> 00:13:35,565
- Yeah. Get out of my light.
- Excuse me.

255
00:13:36,441 --> 00:13:37,442
Eh.

256
00:13:37,526 --> 00:13:38,735
There you are.

257
00:13:39,569 --> 00:13:40,904
That'll be eight bucks.

258
00:13:40,946 --> 00:13:42,572
I'm not charging you for
using the screw here.

259
00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:44,491
[screams in pain]

260
00:13:45,784 --> 00:13:46,451
[screams]

261
00:13:46,535 --> 00:13:47,619
[continues moaning]

262
00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:50,121
Oh, thank you, sir.

263
00:13:50,205 --> 00:13:52,874
I feel like a better person
for having known you.

264
00:13:52,916 --> 00:13:54,083
Okay, all right.

265
00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:56,586
Back out as quick as you can.
Get out of here.

266
00:14:00,298 --> 00:14:01,591
[engine starts]

267
00:14:06,888 --> 00:14:07,556
Ah!

268
00:14:07,597 --> 00:14:08,974
Now, let me see.

269
00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:11,226
There was something I
was supposed to do...

270
00:14:11,268 --> 00:14:13,270
- Water...
- I'm thinking.

271
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:14,896
Oh! Sure, of course.

272
00:14:14,938 --> 00:14:17,190
- Water. Water.
- Yes. Oh, yes.

273
00:14:17,274 --> 00:14:19,067
Oh, yeah. Water.

274
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:21,611
Water... Yeah.

275
00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:24,531
Thank you--

276
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:28,243
[sighs]

277
00:14:28,285 --> 00:14:29,494
Was I thirsty.

278
00:14:34,416 --> 00:14:36,126
- Ed Brown?
- Yeah.

279
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:38,086
Why didn't you do something to
make him feel more comfortable?

280
00:14:38,128 --> 00:14:41,298
I did. I took a screwdriver
out his back.

281
00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:44,342
Antonio, don't worry.
You'll be all right soon, okay?

282
00:14:44,426 --> 00:14:47,304
Raul and I made a beautiful
place for you to lie down.

283
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:48,555
[groaning]

284
00:14:48,638 --> 00:14:50,807
- Are you okay?
- I...

285
00:14:50,849 --> 00:14:53,476
Okay. Are you strong enough
to climb the stairs.

286
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:54,811
Yes, but you will have to help me.

287
00:14:54,853 --> 00:14:58,273
Okay. Okay. Like that.
Easy, easy, easy.

288
00:14:58,315 --> 00:15:00,191
Easy. Okay, try, easy.

289
00:15:00,275 --> 00:15:01,651
Try to make it, okay?

290
00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:04,279
- You cannot do it?
- No, no.

291
00:15:04,321 --> 00:15:05,530
- Okay, I know what to do.
- What?

292
00:15:05,614 --> 00:15:07,824
I'll get behind him and I push, okay?

293
00:15:07,866 --> 00:15:10,535
- Like that. Okay.
Let's see, you can do it.
- [chuckling]

294
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:17,167
Hey!
That's the second time today he's been gored.

295
00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:21,129
Ah, well, Margaret,

296
00:15:21,171 --> 00:15:24,174
let me tell you who is in
our bedroom right now.

297
00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:27,636
A Spanish flamenco guitarist
and a wounded bullfighter.

298
00:15:27,677 --> 00:15:29,137
As you always used to say,

299
00:15:29,179 --> 00:15:31,514
only in America can something
like this happen.

300
00:15:33,850 --> 00:15:36,519
[speaking indistinctly]

301
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,442
Well, what was all that?
What's happening?

302
00:15:42,525 --> 00:15:45,278
Nothing, nothing.
We just have a little medical argument.

303
00:15:45,362 --> 00:15:47,238
A medical argument about what?

304
00:15:47,322 --> 00:15:51,409
Well, his ideas about resting in bed
and mine are totally different.

305
00:15:51,493 --> 00:15:53,119
I see. Well, it looks to me

306
00:15:53,203 --> 00:15:55,121
like there's nothing
really wrong with him.

307
00:15:55,205 --> 00:15:56,873
Oh, yes, there's something
wrong with him.

308
00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:58,291
He's in a serious condition.

309
00:15:58,375 --> 00:16:01,711
[speaking Spanish]

310
00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:09,719
- What does that mean?
- It means he's a turkey.

311
00:16:11,096 --> 00:16:13,223
I want to get something off my chest.

312
00:16:16,810 --> 00:16:19,979
This is a job for Superman.

313
00:16:20,063 --> 00:16:23,024
- [Charo sobbing]
- What is the matter? What?

314
00:16:23,066 --> 00:16:24,943
- Oh, no, don't cry. Don't cry.
- Aunt Charo, don't cry.

315
00:16:25,026 --> 00:16:26,986
- Don't cry.
- I can't help it.

316
00:16:27,070 --> 00:16:29,572
Oh, go get something to
dry your tears with.

317
00:16:29,656 --> 00:16:31,783
Handkerchief or something, anything.

318
00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:34,577
Ah! Oh! Oh!

319
00:16:36,830 --> 00:16:38,039
How did he do that?

320
00:16:40,917 --> 00:16:43,253
- Here you are, Aunt Charo.
- Thank you.

321
00:16:44,254 --> 00:16:45,922
You know, I'm so upset.

322
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,924
Just because my family make a promise,

323
00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:49,843
I have to spend the rest of my life

324
00:16:49,926 --> 00:16:51,261
pretending to love him.

325
00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:53,638
Well, listen, I'm going now.

326
00:16:53,722 --> 00:16:55,306
I'll be right back much later.

327
00:16:55,390 --> 00:16:57,225
Because Antonio, tonight,

328
00:16:57,267 --> 00:16:59,978
want to make the final
plan for our wedding.

329
00:17:00,061 --> 00:17:01,604
Oh, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

330
00:17:01,646 --> 00:17:03,148
If you're really gonna be married,

331
00:17:03,231 --> 00:17:05,442
what would you like for a wedding gift?

332
00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:06,609
Hmm.

333
00:17:07,569 --> 00:17:09,028
Bunk beds.

334
00:17:16,077 --> 00:17:17,912
Ah, well...

335
00:17:19,247 --> 00:17:22,625
Well, what are you looking
at me like that for?

336
00:17:22,667 --> 00:17:24,502
I know what you're thinking.

337
00:17:24,586 --> 00:17:27,797
What, you think I care if she has to
marry somebody she doesn't love?

338
00:17:27,839 --> 00:17:29,424
Every time she gets herself into a mess

339
00:17:29,465 --> 00:17:32,635
you expect me to bail her out,
don't you? Don't you, huh?

340
00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:34,137
Don't you? You---

341
00:17:34,721 --> 00:17:35,972
Okay...

342
00:17:37,974 --> 00:17:40,602
I'll find some way of getting
her out of this mess.

343
00:17:42,145 --> 00:17:44,063
Now will you stop nagging me?

344
00:17:51,654 --> 00:17:53,656
[playing soft tune]

345
00:17:56,493 --> 00:17:58,328
Aunt Charo! Aunt Charo!

346
00:17:58,411 --> 00:17:59,621
- Hey.
- He's coming.

347
00:17:59,662 --> 00:18:01,748
Good. Go upstairs and warn my lover.

348
00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:03,082
- Okay?
- Okay.

349
00:18:06,711 --> 00:18:08,296
[continues strumming tune]

350
00:18:10,215 --> 00:18:12,675
[singing in Spanish]

351
00:18:42,539 --> 00:18:44,707
Oh, you are so beautiful.

352
00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:46,709
And you sing divinely.

353
00:18:46,751 --> 00:18:48,211
And this is for you, my beauty.

354
00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:49,963
Thank you, mi amor.

355
00:18:53,758 --> 00:18:57,095
[speaking Spanish]

356
00:18:57,178 --> 00:18:59,848
You are the best lover I ever had.

357
00:18:59,888 --> 00:19:01,558
You kiss great.

358
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,393
Of course.

359
00:19:03,434 --> 00:19:05,936
You know, every time I walk down
the street in my hometown,

360
00:19:06,020 --> 00:19:09,190
people say, "There he goes.
What a kisser."

361
00:19:10,148 --> 00:19:11,192
Animal.

362
00:19:13,236 --> 00:19:16,573
Ah, but last night-- Last
night was wonderful.

363
00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:19,701
Oh, and the night before, and the
night before, and the night before.

364
00:19:19,742 --> 00:19:20,910
[both sighing loudly]

365
00:19:20,952 --> 00:19:22,412
Thank you, my darling.

366
00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:24,747
But I couldn't have done it without you.

367
00:19:24,789 --> 00:19:26,040
[Charo] Hmm.

368
00:19:27,417 --> 00:19:30,295
Too bad... Too bad
you're getting married.

369
00:19:30,378 --> 00:19:33,798
Oh, and what difference does that make?

370
00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:35,258
We will still see each other.

371
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:38,678
I will sneak to you every night.

372
00:19:38,761 --> 00:19:40,638
Only at night?

373
00:19:40,722 --> 00:19:42,348
Well, that is during the honeymoon.

374
00:19:42,432 --> 00:19:45,059
After the honeymoon, we'll live it up.

375
00:19:46,895 --> 00:19:48,563
Well, why are we talking here for,

376
00:19:48,605 --> 00:19:50,815
when we should be holding
each other in our arms?

377
00:19:50,898 --> 00:19:53,568
- Oh, yes. Oh, yes.
- One moment.

378
00:19:53,609 --> 00:19:55,153
- Are you ready?
- Ready.

379
00:19:55,945 --> 00:19:58,448
[humming together]

380
00:20:09,626 --> 00:20:10,667
Uh-huh!

381
00:20:10,752 --> 00:20:12,754
Antonio!

382
00:20:12,795 --> 00:20:14,172
Have you been there all this time?

383
00:20:14,255 --> 00:20:16,382
I have been here all this time watching.

384
00:20:16,465 --> 00:20:17,842
Then my secret is out.

385
00:20:17,926 --> 00:20:20,053
Yes, and I am leaving.

386
00:20:20,136 --> 00:20:22,513
Does it mean that the wedding is off?

387
00:20:22,597 --> 00:20:24,223
Are you joking?

388
00:20:24,307 --> 00:20:27,143
I'm going to book the honeymoon suite.

389
00:20:27,185 --> 00:20:29,729
If you can turn on an
old duck like this,

390
00:20:29,811 --> 00:20:31,481
think what you can do for me.

391
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:36,069
Ah...

392
00:20:37,528 --> 00:20:40,573
Even though you know we were lovers?

393
00:20:40,657 --> 00:20:42,282
- Yes, we lovers.
- Yes.

394
00:20:42,325 --> 00:20:44,410
It does not bother me.
Do you know why?
I'll tell you why?

395
00:20:44,494 --> 00:20:48,039
- Why?
- Because it is the '70s, and it is accepted.

396
00:20:48,122 --> 00:20:50,124
Yes, we shall be married
within the week.

397
00:20:50,166 --> 00:20:53,670
However, there is one small
matter to be settled.

398
00:20:53,711 --> 00:20:55,088
What?

399
00:20:55,171 --> 00:20:57,507
You must write me a check
for 1,000,000 pesetas.

400
00:20:57,548 --> 00:20:59,008
One million pesetas? For what?

401
00:20:59,050 --> 00:21:02,261
For what? For my dowry.
It is in the contract.

402
00:21:02,345 --> 00:21:05,932
[laughs] But I don't
have 1,000,000 pesetas.

403
00:21:06,015 --> 00:21:09,185
[laughs] But your family
owns half of Espana.

404
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:12,397
The ranches, the cattle, the
sheep, the everything.

405
00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:16,567
Let us face it, your family is loaded.

406
00:21:16,651 --> 00:21:18,403
[mouthing] Loaded.

407
00:21:20,071 --> 00:21:22,198
But they lost everything years ago.

408
00:21:22,281 --> 00:21:24,157
They... lost it?

409
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:25,994
- Everything?
- Everything?

410
00:21:26,035 --> 00:21:29,205
- But I have a contract.
- He has a contract.

411
00:21:29,247 --> 00:21:31,290
Let us look at the bright side, Antonio.

412
00:21:31,374 --> 00:21:33,667
- You can still make money on it.
- How?

413
00:21:33,710 --> 00:21:36,337
I'll give you $5 for that contract.

414
00:21:36,379 --> 00:21:37,296
You got it.

415
00:21:37,380 --> 00:21:39,132
- There you are.
- Thank you.

416
00:21:39,215 --> 00:21:41,509
Now, if someone will tell me
how to get to the airport...

417
00:21:41,551 --> 00:21:42,802
Are you going back to Spain?

418
00:21:42,885 --> 00:21:44,637
No, I'm going back to Cleveland.

419
00:21:44,721 --> 00:21:45,888
- [together] Cleveland?
- Yes.

420
00:21:45,972 --> 00:21:48,224
I am going to see Carmelita Hernandez.

421
00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:51,185
You see, I made a marriage
contract with her father

422
00:21:51,227 --> 00:21:53,730
when I was nine years old.

423
00:21:53,813 --> 00:21:55,481
[scatting loudly]

424
00:22:00,570 --> 00:22:03,948
How about this?
[speaking Spanish]

425
00:22:04,032 --> 00:22:05,282
Don't knock it, my dear.

426
00:22:05,366 --> 00:22:07,368
Five bucks here and five bucks there.

427
00:22:07,410 --> 00:22:09,871
- It mounts up, you know?
- Yeah.

428
00:22:09,912 --> 00:22:11,497
[laughs] We're free

429
00:22:12,415 --> 00:22:14,083
[both scatting]

430
00:22:24,010 --> 00:22:25,595
- Look what the paper said.
- What?

431
00:22:25,678 --> 00:22:29,348
Antonio was fighting a bull in
Mexico City and was gored.

432
00:22:29,432 --> 00:22:30,516
He was gored?

433
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:31,768
Where'd the bull get him?

434
00:22:31,809 --> 00:22:33,561
In Mexico City.

435
00:22:33,603 --> 00:22:35,772
No, no, I don't need that.
I mean, where? What part?

436
00:22:35,855 --> 00:22:37,190
Oh, it doesn't say it.

437
00:22:37,273 --> 00:22:40,151
All it said is he had to
stand up on the plane

438
00:22:40,234 --> 00:22:42,195
all the way back to Madrid.

439
00:22:42,278 --> 00:22:43,362
[laughs]

440
00:22:43,446 --> 00:22:46,032
- Same place Raul got him.
- Same place.

441
00:22:46,115 --> 00:22:48,284
Look, Uncle Ed, I'm getting better.

442
00:22:49,869 --> 00:22:51,579
[Ed] Ah!

443
00:22:51,621 --> 00:22:53,247
[both cheering]

444
00:22:59,796 --> 00:23:01,130
Ole!

445
00:23:02,924 --> 00:23:05,927
Give me that. Now, watch this.

446
00:23:10,848 --> 00:23:12,183
[Ed] Yeah!

447
00:23:16,104 --> 00:23:19,190
Ah, let me see anybody top that.

448
00:23:19,273 --> 00:23:21,400
[both] How did he do that?

449
00:23:27,782 --> 00:23:29,659
[Jack Albertson] Chico and
the Man was recorded live

450
00:23:29,742 --> 00:23:32,244
before a studio audience at NBC Studios,

451
00:23:32,328 --> 00:23:33,996
Burbank, California.

452
00:23:37,333 --> 00:23:40,586
♪ Chico was born
in El Barrio ♪

453
00:23:40,670 --> 00:23:44,298
♪ Spent much of his time
in the street ♪

454
00:23:44,340 --> 00:23:47,510
♪ His mind was craving
for knowledge ♪

455
00:23:47,552 --> 00:23:50,054
♪ His belly
for something to eat ♪

456
00:23:50,138 --> 00:23:53,474
♪ But times are hard♪

457
00:23:53,516 --> 00:23:56,102
♪ Chico and the Man ♪

458
00:23:57,395 --> 00:24:00,439
♪ Times are hard ♪

459
00:24:00,523 --> 00:24:03,276
♪ Chico and the Man ♪

460
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:06,696
♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪

461
00:24:06,737 --> 00:24:08,531
♪ All right♪